I believe in my man, Obama. I have to. What has unfolded in this country within the last eight years with a certain cross-eyed bozo at the helm has left us broken in both wallet and spirit. And most, unfortunately, 4,115 less of us are able to feel anything at all. So what does Stuart Smalley tell us to do when the chips are down? That doggone it, we’re good enough, we’re smart enough and the global community can like us again! We just have to pick ourselves up by the bootstraps and immediately if not sooner get those wind turbines a whirling and give me and all the other normal Joes out there a Hybrid that we can actually afford. I’m not usually one for putting away the sarcasm, as that and a mean Australian Shiraz can at times be my only salvation, but we gotta know when it’s time for all those hokey things like hope, renewal, change for the better, and, hey, I’m even willing to go out on a limb here and theorize that we just might get really crazy and completely hokify our cynical selves and actually believe that it might be possible that one individual's proactive measures, sans whining, can create a ripple in the pond effect to others and so on and so on and that then..we just might kinda have a pay it forward type of thing going on. All that eyeball-rolly stuff is real, ya know? Shakyamuni wasn’t born yesterday. Oh, well, he was, but you know what I mean. We can make a difference. We can make change happen. Oh, well, change is gonna happen whether we friggin' want it to or not. But it can get better, right? We're just going to have to pay 700 bil for it to do so. Oh, come on. That's not too bad. If we could just get Brangelina and Mylie Cyrus to pitch in between the three of them, we'll have it covered! If all this sounds to touchy feely for ya, then click here for a much more adept, less Mag-netized way of putting things..positive plans lying right on the table, there under our snoots. Plans that maybe we can put into motion? Heck, I'm not going to pretend I really know what to do about this oil sitch. I wish my noodle was smart enough to figure it all out. Oh, well, I'll just have to leave it to all of those brainiacs in the think tanks. As I said in an earlier post..maybe I ought to just get a cart and a donkey and go from there. I do have a double lot now. And the kids have been begging me for a pet. What I really need is T. Boone's money and then I could ditch everything, grab my brood, and go to Tahiti and just sit on my butt looking out at that azure heaven where my biggest decision of the day would involve picking the color of the umbrella that would float in my nightly mai-tai.
I’m sorry. I don’t think just because you spend five years in a room with only a light bulb and communicating by tap qualifies you for the Presidency. I do, however, think it shows that you have great fortitude, quite a bit of courage and bravery thrown in there and a very, very determined will to survive. I also don’t think having a couple of journalism classes and seeing Russia out of the kitchen window qualifies ya either. But I dunno..if there are three things that I am just not up on...they would be lipstick, mavericks and soccer. One of 'em, I haven't ever tried, and two, I haven't done in quite awhile. I also don’t think that just because you fought in a war means you love this country any more than someone who did not. Your religious faith? Whatever is fine by me. Just run my country to the very best of your ability, don't thieve and put the separation right on back in between the church and state. Underline it, enhance with bold and use capitols! I certainly do believe though that one absolutely, unequivocally must be an intellectual to run this country..that sheer chutzpah and sound bites simply aren’t enough. I think it's evident to us now at what happens when you put a C student in the Oral..er, I mean Oval Office. Oh, yeah, and while I've got a wish list? Please have the dignity, the class..the cajones, to shake your fellow candidates hand after a debate instead of shuffling your Stepford wife into that position. "That one" would appreciate it, I'm sure. Oh, settle down, Mama. I wish life were like the movies, I’d much prefer a Dave, but alas, it isn’t, so we gotta hang in reality. Besides, nobody gives a hooey what I have to say anyway, but they do if we all say it together.
W. asked me the other day who those ‘two men on the T.V. were’. I had to bite my dry witted tongue and and really try to explain to her what this process means to and for all of us. Not just us here in the States but abroad....at how rocking the vote is more important than ever....at just what it means when people on T.V. stand with big signs in their hands....at what freedom and liberty and equality, you know, all that other hokey stuff is about. I decided I’d refrain from filling her in on how our foreign relations are completely in the crapper, how so many of our military have died senselessly, at how women once had to fight tooth and nail, enduring physical pain, in their struggle for us fellow ladies to even have the right to vote this November in the first place. I mean she’s only five, for goodness sakes. I’ll wait and tell her all that next year. Maybe in a few years after that, when she, herself, is older and wiser, she can try and explain to her mom the craziness of Mr. Bin Laden sitting pretty in a cave, noshing a pita, safe and sound...albeit receiving mountain dialysis...and why he is alive and goes unpunished...to explain the utter nonsense to me of getting socked in the mouth by mean ole Bobby on the playground, but going after Billy for doing it.
I think in some way that this country, in essence, has become the father that my candidate never really had..providing the encouragement, the opportunity, the freedom of discovering just who he was..who he felt that he could become..who, perhaps, he was always meant to be. The scrappiness and tenacity of those who loved him..who worked hard to give him the chance to prove himself stands for just about everything American that I can think of. The stats for young African-American men aren’t very pretty as only 8% of these boys will go on to graduate from college..that the level of incarceration is 7 times higher than those of our white citizens..that 50% of these young fellows are being raised in single parent households. Barack beat against all of the prejudice, misconceptions, preconceptions and the sad fact this country has those kind of stats in the first place for any of our citizens. He couldn't have done it without those that came before him, however, as that is always the case in a nation's history. Barriers were broken through on a personal level, and I have the audacity to hope that the achievements he has accomplished along his 40 something year long journey will transpire to a lot more across the board for this country and we will see a difference. He’s talking it..let’s have some good energy that he will soon be walking it. Besides isn’t it great to have an orator again? It’s been a long eight years since ole Bill.
Oh, yeah, things have got to get a little better. I mean, gas has fallen to $2.79 a gallon (oh, my) and my Wheat Thins have gone back down to two for five bucks. And haulin’ our tired, old, poopily-insured rumps to the polls is a good start to better, don’t ya think? And btw, while you are ambling your way over to that local booth of yours on the 4th, lest not forget what a great privilege it is to be able to even participate in an election. Oh, there I go again..with all that blasted hokey stuff. May I also take a moment (it is my blog, after all) to be so bold to suggest that while you’re behind the curtain, with your venti latte, in that confining little box...that you punch the spot next to the one that has the exotic name? Trust me. You'll be glad ya did. I have only one major regret in my life. And that was when I sang Stoney End in my 10th grade high school talent show. So hopefully this won't be another one. Yeah, I simply must have to believe that things will improve. I'm a mom. Optimism is a requirement. Besides, my kids can't have a bitter wise-ass as their mother all of the time. And double besides- somebodies gotta protect us from stumpy guys in bad suits. Yep, it’s high time we said goodbye to tex-mex and tractors and hello to a cool brotha. Lord knows, if my babies had been born in the Palin household, they would have been christened Mangle Blue and Khaki Salmon. And me? Guzzle Red. Okay, now that one's just not funny. Hits too close to home, I think. And my hubby, Plop Hero, completely agrees.
Oh, relax, my conservative pals. A girl’s gotta keep her sense of humor when she’s sitting square in the middle of a red zone.
See ya at the Polls!
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