a beautiful truth

The morning is still and I'm thinking of you. Today we will visit with tulips and crayons but it won't be the same. Your smile is gone now...your voice is but a whisper. The sun's rays will warm our shoulders and the quiet of it all will have to be enough.

Today we raise a glass to love without conditions, a soft hand upon a cheek and gossip over coffee. We honor that part of our heart that only a mother can fill. And for some of us, the past is really all we have. There are many whose joyful memories were cut short way too early or have gently folded themselves away; some who have sadly had to do without. For those, I will revel in the treasure of my babies' tuck-in this evening and linger just a second more to listen to their peaceful breath. I have no choice but to hold what is left and honor it always. To know that nothing, not even this ravaging eraser of a disease can ever take away our history...your history with my father....your full and amazing story.

I love you, mom. I miss your laugh, the camaraderie, the perfect timing of a phone call...your homemade wheat bread with orange zest. Thank you, for your fervent prayer and perfect love that has buoyed me all the days of my life. Thank you, for believing in my dreams as if they were your own. My deepest wish is to rise to life's occasion and re-gift my two girls with all the heart and twinkle that is you.

Happy Mother's Day to you and all my devoted mommy friends who read this. Each one of you inspire me to do better and love deeper every day.